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Cowboys & Aliens: short, sweet, massive spoilers

11 Jan 2012, Posted by Rob Thurman in Blog

Lucky me, I missed Cowboys & Aliens in the theatre as I was in the hospital at the time, but Netflix came through for me. Here are my four, yep–only four, thoughts on the movie.

Lesson 1: a little peyote can fix anything. (Who didn’t already know that?)

 Lesson 2: the love of your life can be dissected and incinerated by aliens, but the sight of a hummingbird heals all emotional wounds. (They should be dispensing those at the pharmacy instead of anti-depressants.) 

Lesson 3: Hollywood can CGI the hell out of aliens ripping people off horses and impaling them, but can’t do shit with a simple hummingbird. (A Disney cartoon hummingbird is more believable.)  

Finally: how the hell do you screw up a great premise like aliens vs cowboys?? (I waited almost a year for this movie. A year. What a waste of anticipation. Sigh. Someone get me a hummingbird stat.)

 

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  • Lynda

    I was laughing the whole time the “cowboys” were riding, because they were riding English, not western! Maybe back then there wasn’t much of a distinction, but it sure was funny watching all those cowboys post to the trot!

  • Deidre

    Haha!

    Sometimes anticipation seriously blows when it comes to Hollywood.
    I’ve learned to never, ever give my hopes up early.

    That way movies movies surprise me by being better than I would’ve thought otherwise.

    The hummingbird concept it rather hilarious though.
    So random.
    With them we can heal all depression and trauma in the world. Whee!

    If only it was THAT simple…

    On a happier note, I HAVE HIGHSPEED.

    WEWT!! 😀

    Now I can rave about the internet like a true Rob Reaver without lagging behind the crowd!

  • TDoc

    That is when you stop the movie, so several shots of whatever is available then hit play. It’s bound to atleast seem better although you might see it in 2s with the alcohol induced double vision.

  • Jayda

    This is hilarious… now I need to watch it, you know. 😀

  • Ted

    and:
    7. The undercarriage of every high-tech space craft includes an unguarded rocky tunnel for easy access.

  • Ann

    And do not forget these:
    5. A man on a galloping horse can keep pace with an advanced alien craft.
    6. Even aliens have to get gold by stealing it from the natives.